How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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