So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Randomize
