Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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