So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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