yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
