I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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