Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize