ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
