Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
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