I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Randomize
