is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
My feet surprised me
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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