I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Randomize
