Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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