This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize