So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
she smelled like a LAN party
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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