Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She even gives head with a lisp.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
