the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
