eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize