Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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