She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Randomize
