Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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