ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
In other news, I just burned my penis
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize