she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
