We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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