fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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