We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize