During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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