Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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