Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Brb crying the tears of my youth
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
