you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
