Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
We need to rekindle our bromance
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
