butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
