I'm lost and stupid without you.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
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