so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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