i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
It's blow job season.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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