And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize