So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
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i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
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dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
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