8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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