lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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