you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
