So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
