Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Less talking, more tequila
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
