At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
