At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
