I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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