Tell her she can't have a vagina
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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