I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize