Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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