She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize