I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize