isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
